Scorned Acorns and Improper Titles

God damn, this ones a doozy.
I may not even be able to finish it in one go, i may have to come back to it later with more additions, because we are surrounded by this shit.
Here's the big one. My fingers are actually dreading the movements of my fingertips as we get closer and closer to the inevitable.

Titles that lie.

I looked.
Guess what.
This store does NOT actually sell

1. Mattresses (or as we common folk call them: Beds)
2. Baths (or Tubs or Jacuzzis)

So why this store has been called this is beyond me

thats all this store should be
Beyond.

And lets just get into what "Beyond" entails.
Pizza Rollers
As seen on TV bullshit like the snuggie
stress balls
sneeze guards
george formans
like FUCK! are you kidding me?
My beliefs of 'beyond' lies in the beautiful words of a beautiful man:

Somehow, "To infinity and Pizza Rollers!" just doesnt have the same flow.


-Acorned.